Category: Mommy 101

What are stretch marks?
Stretch marks affect about 8 out of 10 pregnant women. A stretch mark is a type of scar that develops when our skin stretches or shrinks quickly. The abrupt change causes the collagen and elastin, which support our skin, to rupture. As the skin heals, stretch marks may appear.

What causes stretch marks?
During pregnancy your hormones can soften the fibres of your skin, making it more prone to stretch marks. You may get stretch marks on your tummy as your baby grows and your skin stretches. You may also develop them on your thighs and breasts as they get bigger. When this happens will be different for everyone. The first sign may be some itching.

Stretch marks aren’t harmful and don’t cause any medical problems.

Can I prevent stretch marks?
Stetch marks are said to be hereditary. So if your mom, grandma had stretch marks its highly likely you will get them. You can’t always prevent stretch marks occurring, especially during pregnancy but here are some things you an try.

1. Gain weight steadily
2. Keep hydrated
3. Keep skin moisturized
4. Eat healthy

What causes stretch marks?
You are more likely to get stretch marks if your weight gain is more than average in pregnancy. Every pregnant woman gains weight differently so there are no official guidelines for how much weight you should gain. The most important thing is to eat a healthy, balanced diet, which will help to keep your weight gain to a safe and healthy level for you and your baby. Most women put on between 10kg (22lb) and 12.5kg (28lb) during their pregnancy, although this varies from woman to woman.

Gaining the weight steadily during your pregnancy can help reduce the effect of stretch marks.

The appearance of stretch marks can be difficult for some women and affect their confidence. But even if you’re concerned about stretch marks, don’t try to lose weight while you’re pregnant. This is not healthy for you or your baby.

Treating stretch marks
There are a few treatment options available, although there isn’t much evidence that they work.

You could try:
Using makeup
Using creams, gels or lotions.
There are a lot of these on the market and the manufacturers often claim they can remove stretchmarks. But while it’s unlikely they can prevent stretch marks some may help make them fade away. For best result, they should be applied when your stretch marks are still red or purple as he scarring is still fresh. Massaging the skin may also help.

Laser therapy
This can’t completely remove stretch marks, but it may help them fade. Laser therapy can be expensive and isn’t available on the NHS.
Your stretch marks probably won’t go away completely after your baby is born. But they should gradually fade from a pink or purplish colour to white and become much less noticeable.

WHAT IS BAD PARENTING?
The definition of bad parenting is not a single act of poor nurturing but rather a series of such actions that invariably harm the little one’s demeanor and psychology. A parent may feel guilty and will try to reconcile, but it often yields poor results.

WHAT ARE THE SIGNS OF BAD PARENTING?
Several parenting incidences point towards being a bad parent. Here are some unintentional things you could be doing to fit the label of being a bad mother or father:

1. THE CHILD IS REPRIMANDED EVEN IF HE SPOKE THE TRUTH:
The child did something wrong and acknowledged it, nevertheless, you scold him for committing a mistake. And you have forgotten that he was courageous enough to be truthful.

2. YOU SCOLD, PUNISH AND HIT THE CHILD IN FRONT OF EVERYONE:
There is no hesitation in castigating the little one irrespective of the place and the people. You scold him in front of his siblings, grandparents, cousins, and even the neighbors. You even whip a slap or two.

3. MORE ADVICE, LESS ENCOURAGEMENT:
All you do is tell him how to do things (“You should wake up early for better grades.”) rather than encourage him with positive words (“You are far intelligent dear. I’ll help you wake up early to get better grades.”)

4. NOT DISPLAYING ADEQUATE AFFECTION:
Ever wondered why your child is always trying to get your attention by troubling you with naughty tricks? It is quite likely that he feels a lack of emotional connect and warmth from his parents.

5. NOT SUPPORTIVE WHEN HE NEEDS YOU THE MOST:
It could be your child’s school examination time when he needs a lot of support from you. But you focus on your official work or another commitment, which makes the child feel neglected.

6. THERE IS ALWAYS A COMPARISON TO SOMEONE ELSE:
It is good to set positive role models for your child but always comparing him with someone, especially a sibling or the child next door, is a sign of bad parenting.

7. NEVER PROUD OF THE ACHIEVEMENTS:
You express no excitement or joy when your kid comes home beaming with pride about his win in a contest. In fact, there have been few instances of pride in your parenthood.

8. ALWAYS HAVING A CRITICIZING TONE:
You see everything the child does in a negative light, and are always critical of him. This is different from not appreciating something since there you are indifferent, but here you just disapprove everything.

9. MAKE NO EFFORTS IN UNDERSTANDING AND RESPECTING THE FEELINGS:
You may spend a lot of time in teaching good things but never spare a moment to understand the little one’s opinion and feelings. Every time he shares something, you rule it out as gibberish and do not take it seriously.

10. NOT SHOWING THE RIGHT WAY OF DOING THINGS:
It is not just about showing the path but also walking with the child for the first few steps. Investing more in actions than words is important.

11. SETTING POOR EXAMPLES:
Children learn habits, whether good or bad, from their parents. If the child does something wrong and inappropriate, then spare a moment to introspect for he may have learnt it from you.

12. THE CHILD IS NEVER OFFERED A CHOICE:
Parents decide everything for their children, from the school they study to the clothes they wear. In this process, you tend to get rigid to the point that you forget to give a choice to the child. That makes the child yearn for other things, and in some cases, he will not hesitate even to steal it.

13. PAMPERING TO THE POINT THE CHILD BECOMES ARROGANT:
It’s nice to shower attention and materialistic love but not so much that the child becomes a spoilt brat. He takes everything for granted and does not understand the value of anything. It makes him pretentious, which can lead to the formation of a negative social image.

14. HELP SOLVE EVEN THE SMALLEST PROBLEMS:
It is good to hold the hand but not to the point that the child is unable to do anything on his own. This results in low self-confidence and self-esteem.
Along with these signs of bad parenting, there are also certain habits that make you a bad parent.

15. PHYSICALLY INTIMIDATE THE CHILD:
You just raise your hand, or worse, show a fist every time your child does something wrong. Intimidation has become your primary tool to discipline your child, irrespective of the mental or physical impact it has on him. Cultivating a fear towards you to control the child is tantamount to bullying, which is quite a pathetic thing.

16. GIVING SHORT, GRUMPY ANSWERS:
A child needs guidance through wise and comforting words, but instead, you choose to respond in terse replies that leave the child bewildered yet also disappointed. He may approach you multiple times to get an appropriate reaction, but you continue to be stubborn.

Their first poop doesn’t stink.

The black, tar-like stuff called meconium is made up of mucus, fluid from the womb, and anything else they digested while inside mom. But it doesn’t yet have the gut bacteria that make poop smelly. As soon as you start feeding a baby, bacteria will start colonizing their intestines. After a day or so, bowel movements become green, yellow, or brown — with that familiar odor.

Sometimes infants stop breathing.

Likely when they’re sleeping, they may pause without a breath for 5 to 10 seconds — just enough time to make a new mom or dad panic. Irregular breathing is normal. (But if your baby stops breathing for a longer time or turns blue, it’s a medical emergency.) When babies are excited or after crying, they may take more than 60 breaths in a minute.

They can scare themselves.

It doesn’t take much to startle a newborn: a loud noise, strong scent, bright light, sudden motion, even their own cries. You’ll know it’s happened when he flings his arms out to the sides, hands open, then quickly closes up and tucks back in toward his body. This Moro reflex might have developed as a warning signal that a young monkey was off-balance, so mom could prevent a fall.

Here are nine reasons why pregnancy sex is not only healthy, but why it might be even better than before.

1. An easier labor and recovery
Having an orgasm increases the contractions in your pelvic floor, which help to strengthen the muscles you’ll need for labor and after delivery.

“Once you’ve pushed your baby through those muscles, they’ll have an easier time strengthening up,” said Jeanne Faulkner, a registered nurse in Portland, Oregon and author of “Common Sense Pregnancy: Navigating a Healthy Pregnancy and Birth for Mother and Baby.”

2. Less bathroom breaks
Feel like you always have to pee? Frequent trips to the bathroom, even leaking when you sneeze or laugh can happen when you’re pregnant. Plus, as your baby gets bigger and presses on your bladder, it can be even more uncomfortable. The good news is that the same muscles that you’ll be strengthening for your labor can also help with the flow of urine, said Tammy Nelson, PhD, author of “Getting the Sex You Want.”

3. Complication prevention
According to a Danish study , frequent sex may help prevent pre-eclampsia. Researchers believe it’s because of a protein found in sperm that can regulate the body’s immune system. Yet because the cause of preeclampsia is unknown, it’s important to keep your prenatal visits and talk to your doctor about your risk.

4. Lowered blood pressure
Although your blood pressure may be lower right after having sex, it’s only temporary so the cure isn’t sex all the time, Faulkner said. Since high blood pressure can be serious for both you and your baby, it’s important to work with your doctor on ways to prevent or control your blood pressure.

5. Better orgasms
Since your body’s nerve endings are more sensitive, your nipples and clitoris are engorged, and there’s more estrogen drawing blood flow to your pelvis, it’s usually easier to achieve orgasm and they’re also longer and stronger, Nelson said. Plus, women who had trouble having an orgasm prior to pregnancy may now find they no longer do.

6. Improved self-esteem
With all the changes that happen during pregnancy, it can feel that your body is no longer your own. Yet having sex can help restore your body confidence and positive feelings about yourself.

“For a lot of women, it’s a time in life where [sex] is a really important part of who they are, their relationship and how they feel,” Faulkner said.

7. Stress reduction
Although pregnancy is usually a happy time, it’s normal to worry about things like work, finances and how your life will change after your baby is born. Oxytocin, the love hormone that your body releases when you have an orgasm, can help to negate some of that stress and also help you sleep better.

8. Improved connections
Having frequent sex now will help strengthen the intimate relationship and bond you have with your partner and establish a healthy habit for the future.

“It’s important to connect with your partner now while you have time because you’re going to need that connection once the baby is born,” Nelson said.

9. Preparation for labor
If you’re full-term or past your due date, having sex won’t put you into labor, but it can help your body prepare because semen contains prostaglandins which can help ripen the cervix, Faulkner said.

Diet and nutrition are important for pregnant women. Throughout their pregnancy, women are given recommendations of food to eat while pregnant and foods to avoid.

Although fruit is part of a good balanced diet, certain fruits —including papaya —pregnant women are told to avoid include:

Grapes. There are various opinions about grapes and pregnancy based on the resveratrol in grapes and the difficulty in digesting grape skins.
Pineapple. There’s an opinion that pineapple may cause miscarriage, but this isn’t backed by scientific evidence.

Should I avoid papaya while pregnant?

Yes and no. There’s confusion around eating papaya while pregnant because ripe papaya is good for pregnant women while unripe papaya isn’t.

Although ripe papaya can be a beneficial part of nutrition for pregnant women, unripe papaya can be very dangerous. Some pregnant women continue to eat ripe papaya throughout their pregnancy. However, some women decide to eliminate all papaya from their diet until after they give birth, as there are many other sources of nutrition to enjoy safely during pregnancy.

If you’re pregnant or planning on becoming pregnant, talk with your doctor about proper nutrition including foods to avoid.

Eating a balanced diet during pregnancy is important for the health of you and your baby, and eating healthy, nutritious foods now will help your baby be more open to them when they start solids after 6 months.

Eating smaller meals more frequently is a good rule to follow, especially if you are experiencing morning sickness or heartburn.

What to avoid eating when pregnant:

1. Soft cheese, such as Brie and Camembert (these can contain the dangerous bacteria listeria) and unpasteurized milk and juices
   
2. Deli meat can also contain listeria, so it’s best to avoid deli meat all together OR heat the meal before you eat it
   
3. More than two portions of oily fish (e.g. fresh tuna, sardines, mackerel, trout) a week. These contain high levels of mercury, which can damage your baby’s developing nervous system.
   
4. Marlin, shark or swordfish, or more than four cans of tuna per week as these also contain high levels of mercury
   
5. Liver or liver products (e.g. pate or sausage) contain large amounts of Vitamin A, which can be harmful to your unborn baby
   
6. Raw or undercooked meats or fish, including sushi